I spoke with Dana, my best friend, after not seeing her face for over three months. That’s the longest we’ve gone since affirming our soul-mate status. A few hours later, I hung up and after my heart sunk, I realized how much I needed that conversation. Dana puts things into perspective for me- as best friends tend to do- when we fail to gain perspective on our own.
She lends me her point of view in the worst of times and at the best- she grounds me when I’m flying so high that I lose oxygen and she holds my head above water when I’m sinking.
She’s my floaties.
Sometimes, more than anything else, that’s what we need most- a bit of outside perspective. But outside the MBA- not outside ourselves…because Dana knows me inside and out- and has a 2nd, 3rd, 4th, and 5th sense about my mental state- my downfalls, all I hope to make of my life, my future failures. And accomplishments.
So in our discourse- she revealed a few truths- she put me at ease in a way no one else can.
Some things I’ll share and some I’ll keep to myself. I wouldn’t want to expose all my weaknesses- and all my secret weapons all at once…not just yet.
There’s been this sneaking suspicion in the back of my mind that I’m making a mistake by keeping the whole “b-school” community at an arms length. By this, I mean that unlike most things in my life- I’m not throwing myself completely into the whole society thing. I’ve keeping it at bay- dipping a toe or two in every so often but for the most part- doing my own thing…my own things.
Dana reminded me that I’ve always been a free agent.
I told her my fear of not yet having figured out the ideal path for me…that no bulb has lit up in my mind, flashing in neon letters, the words paving the way to career utopia.
Dana reminded me that my perfect job has never been and will never been one that can be simply defined- in school books or words, neon or not.
I told Dana that I was scared that my energies were all focused on the wrong things- that I look left when everyone else is looking right and I look up when I have been told to look down.
Dana asked me why would I ever want to look right? Or down? She reminded me that I’m living my life exactly as I should.
So thank you Dane, when are you next available?