When you prepare for something for so long, it always seems a bit like an illusion. Moving to Spain- for me- was an illusion- it still is. There are moments, a few times a day, when I stop myself in the middle of the street, or mid-way through a glass of Cava and look around in shock. I stop, I take a deep breath, and I almost have to remind myself that I live here.
I live in Barcelona.
There are things in this life that we plan and confidently believe will come to pass. And then there are those things that are so incredible- that until they happen, we choose not to fully believe them for fear of being disappointed.
I had always dreamed of living in Barcelona, of doing my MBA, of absolute freedom and of a new journey smack in the middle of my current one- because after all, life is one big ride.
What I generally find is that when these “preparations” actually do come to pass- they are not as grand- or as spectacular as we had once hoped, or expected.
Being here now though, is even better than I ever could have imagined- and that surprises me. I was scared that my life has been too big- that coming here wouldn’t compare to what I’ve had…or wouldn’t live up to the standard I have set for myself.
Yet, I have only been here a week- so I may be getting ahead of myself- but I honestly think that I got exactly what I wanted…which is pretty damn rare.
I’m still incredulous at the fact that I am here- that I live here- that it’s 9:00 p.m. and I haven’t even begun to get ready for dinner- but I’m not stressed- and no one is counting on me to be ready anytime soon.Estamos en España.
But what’s the most shocking to me, is what I feel when I walk down the street- how I feel when I am sitting at a café, ordering tapas, on the metro, drinking four cortados a day, searching for fresh produce on the market, sidestepping the shady charcters on Las Ramblas, even sitting in class for the first time in five years….it’s sheer joy. Like I said- it’s all part of the ride- a massive detour from my original path that has now BECOME my journey.
Barcelona, a week in, is already home.
Now all I have to do is find an apartment….